Clive Barkers Ridin' The Meat Train!

Let met start off by saying happy international zombie day! ok, so i just finished reading the article in the latest fangoria magazine about the upcoming movie, the midnight meat train. only recently did i find out that clive barker actually had his hands on this project all the way through; i was under the assumption his only role was writing the story in his books of blood anthology back in 1984. japanese director ryuhei kitamra is the main man in this film but had clive barker as his right hand man and advisor for pretty much the whole filming process. you can almost tell there is a j-horror influence on this film while watching the trailer; the blood and guts of america, and the stylized beauty of japan. oh and there is plenty of blood and gut, and sexual themes, and nudity, and terrible language and everything else i think of when good old clive barker is involved with something. in fact, there is so much the MPAA wasn't able to give the film an R rating. leave it to lions gate to pick up a film that no one else will touch (devils rejects ring a bell). this whole not being able to rate the film thing really does worry me, as of now, i've read quite a few different release dates, some as early as last week, some as late as mid august, hopefully this doesn't turn into a straight to dvd movie. probably the most exciting thing about this film is the fact that they didn't mess up their casting. when ever my imagination put face to character i have always thought vinnie jones would make the perfect mr. mahogany, the main antagonist who specializes in the butcher and processing of the human body. as i picked up my new copy of fangoria i saw the cover picture, vinnie jones in a suit, holding a bloody meat tenderizing mallet. JOY! i'm quite stocked for this film indeed and will count down... or... up? to its eventual release date. cheers!

An Epic May 24 Tale... Now With Pictures!

i guess some of you have heard the harrowing tail of the may 24 weekend. it contains plane attacks, terrorism, car crashes, near death experiences and latent homosexuality. If you haven't... gather round, and listen to the tale... now with pictures!

a few of us had decided to take a trip, overseas, to clear our alcohol and school riddled minds. on the way to the airport, disaster struck; we were attacked by a run away jeep. we narrowly survived, but jeremey's car, alas, wasn't so lucky.


after walking for 17 hours towards the toronto airport, i started to notice sheldon, in a way i never noticed him before


then, i noticed jeremey in the same way.

needless to say i had my way with the both of them. sheldon was pleased with this.


finally we had made it, two weeks late for our flight. the good people at air canada squeezed us onto a flight anyways; we were quite happy.

well, everyone was happy except sheldon, who couldn't manage to get service from a flight attendant, no matter how many times he pressed the help button.

the flight was pleasant... at first. we all passed the time with activities we all enjoyed very much; sarah took her hobby of putting herself in tight places and proceeded to climb into the overhead compartment while jeremey hailed a flight attendant so he could hit the sauce.

sheldon quietly entertained himself by reading a copy of aerospace weekly. unfortunately he got confused, due to his strict read only in the washroom policy, and pooped his pants. tia enjoyed said aromas.

tia and i played a rousing round of 'try and look up my nose'.

due to jeremey's excessive 10am drinking binge, his senses had been heightened ten fold. he could tell, disaster was afoot.

'the plane! shes going down!' jeremey exclaimed, and panic ensued.

suddenly, sarah began to dance just as though the fear had been purged from her like a warming colonic. we all inquired why she was so calm in such a harrowing and tragic moment. she then reminded jeremey and i that we were both licensed pilots and we could easily set the plane down ourselves.

jeremey and i rushed to the cockpit and with some careful calculation, assessed our situation.


quite scuccessfully, we culminated our skills and set down the plane. quickly, i noticed the love of my life, tia, had gone missing.

in her seat, there was a note. it was addressed 'to my love, john'. the note explained that she was behind the plane going down, in an attempt to crash it into the west edmonton mall; canada's most prized natural resource. she had fled the plane and commandeered a fighter jet. the woman i loved, was in reality, a terrorist.

jeremey and myself knew what we had to do. we had to shoot, my terrorist soul mate from the sky. one comondered fighter jet and ten thousand feet later, we were hot on tia's jihad-ridden trail. suddenly, tragedy reared its ugly head... jeremey, regrettably, noticed a button. due to his slight mental retardation that pertains to pushing buttons, there was nothing i could do. the button, of course, was the seat ejection button and his simple mind drove his finger straight into the center of it.

i tried! oh god how i tried! but i could only hold onto his hand-me-down american eagle sweater sleeve for so long. my sweaty grip failed, and jeremey plunged to his dark, dreary, bloody, shitty, screaming explodingly doomful doom.

i hope this story, of my may 24 weekend, has dazzled and amazed you. i hope from my sorrow you can find a wealth of entertainment, especially you breanna marsh, you who revels in my anguished despair! i hope... be it only a hope, that my terrorist lady love comes back to me one day. and i hope that sheldon get his pooping every time he reads problem under control.

Diary of the Dead... Finally

So diary of the dead has finally been released on dvd. its taken some time for this movie to be seen by the masses in canada, but it has finally made it. in an earlier entry i discussed the headache it was, trying to see this movie during its limited canadian theater run; it lasted a month at most and hit three or four canadian theaters, how wonderful. needless to say, i bought my self a copy as soon as it was available and watched it, and i was quite pleased. the last 'of the dead' movies was alright. i know many die hard romero fans despised 'land of the dead' and with good reason. but we all have to remember it really wasn't george's movie by the theatrical release. 'diary of the dead' really had george's style and i was very excited about that. it almost seemed to have echoes from his original 'night of the living dead'. as all of his films seem to center around what is happening in our world socially and politically, it was fitting that this movie was centered around information sharing through blogs, youtube, myspace and all the file and text sharing sites. as our characters make their way through the zombie scared landscape of middle america, they record everything along the way, and upload it to the internet quite frequently. actually, it feels a little odd blogging about this movie, seeing thats what the whole point of the movie is, sifting through the crap thats available to find the truth; i hope i'm not adding to the digital crap pile, but i probably am. this story could almost be considered a cyberpunk/horror movie accept for the fact that the technology is the medium for the story, help communication and without the technology in question, the story would ultimately be impossible to tell. in all, i was quite impressed with the movie, and i think it was worth the wait. of course, were never gonna see anything quite as quality as the original trilogy, but that to be expected. The sequel to this movie is in the works, as far as i know, it's in post production. the basis of the movie is a little shady so far. from what i hear, it takes place on an island and i believe it stars the remaining three characters who survive. oh by the way, spoiler alter =P regardless of all the shady info, i'm really excited to see the sequel... and maybe the third? do i smell a new george romero zombie trilogy? smells like rotting flesh and fresh blood to me!
check it out, and happy zombie hunting, cheers!

Nine Inc Nails Delivers Digitally

This morning i downloaded the new nine inch nails album, 'the slip'. i downloaded it legit from the website and it was free! trent reznor (nin's front man and master mind had this to say about the album on his website.

thank you for you continued and loyal support over the years - this one's on me

i listened to half of it on the on the way to school. i'm liking it. this album is the second digital release from nine inch nails, and the first one to be completely free. i wish we would have seen this sooner, i love the idea of taking out the middle man, (much like my post below about wii-ware)its a great way of cutting costs in a world where everything is getting more and more expensive. like i said, i wish we would have seen this before but i think that mainly had to do with cutting away from the universal music group. ever since their contract has been expired, trent reznor has released two full length albums under his new vanity label 'the null corporation'. the first album of course being his monster sized ambient album 'ghosts i-iv' which is reminiscent of the still album, which was a short remake and ambient disc that came packaged with the deluxe edition of the bands live album, 'and all that could have been'. but i slip, back to 'the slip'... what a wonderful transition =). This album very much mid to late 2000s nine inch nails. the fuzzy base we've come to love (or not so much) is ever present in almost every track, while trent's haunting piano cuts the feed back and distortion beautifully. i my self have tried putting grand piano with hall effects in my own work that is soaked with feed back and i can never seem to do it right... i guess that's why hes got the record deal and the company and the millions of dollars. i'm really excited to see what the future is going to bring for digital download albums, thank god for radiohead's 'in rainbows' for getting the ball rolling with this viable media for music. however, i want to reiterate that i think nine inch nails would have been the first successful band to offer a download able album if it weren't for their ex-parent record label who forbid them from doing so. if you have any free hard drive space and the slightest love of music, i recommend downloading 'the slip' from www.nin.com, its free, and its great. below i posted a fan made video of the first single 'discipline' off of the new nin album 'the slip'. why a fan made video you ask? this video has been circulating the net and being labeled as 'the official music video' for the song, which it is most certainly not, but its goddamn hilarious. what especially makes it hilarious is the fact that everyone thinks its actually the official release. something tells me trent has seen this and probably loves it. enjoy, cheers!

We <3 Wii-Ware

Yesterday i downloaded my first wii-ware game. i decided to download 'lost winds' and i'm glad i did. first of all, wii-ware is relatively new concept (for nintendo that is, microsoft has the market place for the 360, and sony has some sort of online purchasing systems for the ps3.) brought out on mothers day with a system update from nintendo. the whole idea is to bring games, good games, from small time developers to the masses without the large price tag. your not gonna find a wii-ware game that is gonna cost you anymore then 1500 (15 bucks) but you're gonna find fresh new ideas that in my opinion are better then some of the software available on cd for 50+ dollars. in the days of underground gaming the best places to look were new grounds and ebaums world. the small, flash games were beautifully executed because they were made by the gaming public itself, not a board of graphic designers. i was a little skeptical at first, when i heard that they were embracing small time developers and bringing them to the masses, i suspected that it was just a ploy from nintendo to pump out a few games and try and get some credibility with the flash gaming community. however, on the launch day i was surprised to see the title 'protect your castle' which was a huge internet phenomenon that was released in the summer of 2003. i spent many an hour tossing stick men to their demise and watching them explode at the foot of my mighty castle. i was also really happy to see that it was made by by xgen studios which was the group of people who made the original, of course it has a few upgrades, more stick men, better graphics and what not, HOWEVER, the violence and blood has been pretty much taken out of the game so it fits more into nintendo's catalog and gets an E rating. what a shame; watching those little stick men splat in a puddle of red was quite satisfying. i however do understand why they decided to take the blood and gore out, seeing it is a download, it is available to everyone; there is no sales clerk asking you if you your 18 years of age as you buy your bright shiny new game disc. come to think of it, nintendo has embraced the little guy in the past. back in 2002 dan paladin and tom fulp released another online game, 'alien hominid' which was probably one of the best online flash games i ever played. nintnedo gave this game a chance, and a few years later offered dan and tom a spot on the nintendo game cube for a launching of 'alien hominid' to the commercial video game population. since then, at the beginning of 2007, 'alien hominid' was turned into a high definition 1080i game for download on the xbox live market place. like i said, i have only downloaded one game, 'lost winds' and am really happy with my 5 bucks spent, the game play is fresh with innovative controls, not to mention, its a side scroller. ever since the adoption of the joystick onto ALL console controllers we never ever ever see side scrollers anymore, but this game really delivers. i hope nintendo keeps this up, and it becomes more excepted to download larger and larger games instead of buying everything on software. it probably wont, seeing nintendo would be shooting itself in the foot by lowering sales in in software... hopefully it works itself out. i'm think i'm gonna go home after class and download 'pop'. cheers!

just a quick side note: i just went over the release titles for wii-ware and there are some really promising looking games in the works, especially next months, homestar runner game, which will be released in five episodes, all of them point and click adventure games, i can't even wait.

EarthBound

i just read that earthbound is FINALLY making it's way onto the virtual console for the wii, thank god, an 8 dollar download sure beats buying the cartridge for $250 and up.
good show nintendo!

Tales From Earthsea

The film 'tales from earthsea' is something that i've been waiting for, for such a long time, its more or less a topic of frustration for me, and i'm sure for studio ghibli, the movie house who created and distributed this film. it seems that the sci-fi channel hold rights to the name, from a mini series that they made that follows the same story line that the movie does, which is taken from a fantasy novel of the same name. as it turns out, the sci fi channel isn't willing to give up their rights and are planning on holding onto the rights until they expire in 2009. because the rights only pertain to north america, the rest of the world has already had the theater premier and the dvd release come and go; i find it strange that north america is going to be the last one to get rights to distribution of this movie. i think the biggest tragedy of this situation is that this movie is the fact that 'tales from earthsea' is the directorial debut of goro miyazaki, son of the creater of studio ghibli and most acclaimed director from studio ghibli, hayao miyazaki. hopefully this wrench thrown into the works doesn't hinder his directorial career. this film wasn't originally set to be directed by goro. before hayao's first film 'nausicca, in the valley of the wind' was created, he contacted ursula guin (the writer of tales from earthsea trilogy) with his interest in adapting her books into film. he was turned down. only after his award winning movie 'spirited away' was released, did she contact him and tell him she would be honored if he would direct the movie of her film, however, hayao was busy directing 'howl's moving castle' so the project was handed down to goro, under close supervision from the ghibli veterans. as it turns out, the sci fi channel went and made a version of the books into a lack-luster tv miniseries without the blessings of the author, thus taking hold of the name rights, preventing goro from releasing the movie until at least 2009. i myself don't understand why they wouldn't sign over rights, so this movie can see the light of day in north america. if anyone knows of a petition site i can sign to get this going a bit sooner, drop me a line. here's the trailer with the theme song, cheers.

A Break From My Coma

So it has been a while since i have written anything in this little blog but i'm doing so at request of tia.
Its been a very busy past little while, what with the semester ending and what not, projects and papers due and the looming shadow of a week full of finals, bleh. However, that was two weeks ago, and i'm pretty sure my only excuse is that i'm quite lazy. Its been quite the comatose two weeks, both my mother and father are gone far far away, and tia is in orillia, so its been me, in my big empty house, all alone. Its quite enjoyable, but i'm looking forward to heading back to school on monday, i could use some human interaction. The weather has been ever so crappy. We were teased with that 3 or 4 day long span of beautiful weather, but now its just cold and rainy, i guess the grass needs it... but not this guy *points thumb ay himself*. Im quite excited about taking my gen ed this semester, its science fiction, so it should be a bird coarse for me... however, i hear they don't even touch star wars... what kind of science fiction class wouldn't touch star wars? seriously! which reminds me, the new star wars animated movie, clone wars, comes out in august, i'm pretty pumped, i have the original cartoon network mini series on dvd, and i've read a few things on it, so it should be interesting; i believe they have added some new characters, neat. Im also excited that they are going to go more in depth into general grievous AND general durge, who dies in the clone wars (in between episode 2 and 3) so we didn't get to see any of him on the big screen, same with asajj ventress, count dooku's apprentice, we only ever see her in the clone wars as she disappears shortly before the evens of episode three happen. i'm such a geek. heres the trailer for the upcoming clone wars movie,


i've also been digging deep into my music collection and listening to a lot of stuff that i haven't really put any time or effort into, namely, the late, great elliott smith, god i love him, check out his stuff if you haven't ever heard of him. he died from an apparent self inflicted stab wound to the heart, how tragic. here is yet another video, this one of the song angeles, by elliot smith. this is a particularly neat video because his capo pops off during the performance and everyone gets a good laugh.

well there you have it, i've written something new, cheers.